WISE BUT FUNNY WORDS

~~~~~ Answering machine message, "I am not available right now, but thank you for caring enough to call. I am making some changes in my life. Please leave a message after the beep. If I do not return your call, you are one of the changes."

~~~~~ Aspire to inspire before you expire.

~~~~~ My wife and I had words, but I didn't get to use mine.

~~~~~ Frustration is trying to find your glasses without your glasses. ~~~~~

Blessed are those who can give without remembering and take without forgetting. ~~~~~

The irony of life is that, by the time you're old enough to know your way around, you're not going anywhere.

~~~~~ God made man before woman so as to give him time to think of an answer for her first question.

~~~~~ I was always taught to respect my elders, but it keeps getting harder to find one.